Ninja (2009) Reviews

• Ninjawesome!

  mikemdp2012-12-18

  So at one point, the leader of a cult that really has little bearing on anything in this movie proclaims, "We control the life blood of this planet!" Wait, what? It's not just that it makes little sense. It makes no sense whatsoever. Not much of this movie does. But hey, you want a tight plot that makes sense and gives you pause to think? Netflix "Glengarry Glen ****ing Ross." This ain't that. You want to see a ninja cut a man's arm off with his ninja sword and the man goes "Ahh! Ahh! Ahh!" while blood spurts out of his stump, then this is the movie for you. You want to see a stacked gravure idol as a dojo master's daughter who always needs to be saved just because she's a stacked gravure idol and even though she's a ninja, too, then this is the movie for you. You want shurikens, poison blowgun darts, a ninja flying suit, and an SUV that rolls over and blows up spectacularly for NO FREAKING REASON, then this is the movie for you. You want to see two ninjas have swordfight on the rooftop of a skyscraper with the Empire State Building in the background and you say, "This is the most awesomest thing ever!" in your best Peter Griffin voice, then babe, this is the ****ing movie for you. You want sense? Read Jane ****ing Austen. You want ninjawesome, grab this baby, some chips and a Stella Artois and you're set for the night, brochacho.

• Dudikoff never moved like that!

  ericthered012009-11-24

  "Ninja" does something that is hard to do.... it updates something from the past but still retains a nostalgic feel about it. Sometimes it felt like it was 1985 and I was a kid sitting on the living room floor eating popcorn and watching American Ninja. But then I see Scott Adkins do an amazing aerial kick and I know I'm not watching Michael Dudikoff. "Ninja" takes a similar formula and story from those ninja movies from the 80's and combines it with a hard hitting and acrobatic fighting style seen in today's martial arts movies. This movie was a lot of fun and if you grew up watching ninja and martial arts movies in the 80s like me, you will definitely enjoy it.

• Yes, it's cheesy...but still pretty enjoyable

  Heislegend2009-11-24

  Like undoubtedly 90% of the people who will watch this movie, I was whole-heartedly expecting something in the vein of those awful 80's movies like American Ninja or Master Ninja. Well...OK...I was partially right. But this seems to have a little more going for it. Namely: Scott Adkins. Look, I know martial arts doesn't have a nationality, but it's been a long time since I saw a westerner do such a good job in a screen fight. I didn't even realize this was the same guy from The Tournament and Undisputed II. I guess he's got a thing for low balling his own talent and being in cheesy movies? Regardless, this guy has the screen fighting ability to carry a whole movie...but he's settling for this? To each his own, I suppose. The plot is...lacking. That's a nice way to say that, right? It's basically about a disgraced member of a dojo who sets out to steal it's prized possession...some dumb box. Whatever. So the sensei (you knew there'd be a sensei, right?) sends two of his best to protect said dumb box. Well, OK, to be fair one of them is his best student. The chick doesn't do much except get knocked around and kidnapped...constantly. You can probably guess where this is going, so I'll spare you. Oh...there's a secret society bent on evil. Can't forget that. But like I said, it's still pretty enjoyable. The fight scenes are very well done...surprisingly so considering they didn't come out of Hong Kong or Thailand. A lot of the "stylized violence" (a really stupid term meaning pretty much all blood is CGI) is pretty poorly done, but it can be excused. I just can't imagine it's cheaper to do than practical effects. All in all I actually liked this movie, flaws and all. Definitely a movie you can crack a few beers open and watch.

• Ninjas for ninjas sake...

  loogenhausen2011-11-08

  The highest praise I can heap upon Ninja is that there is absolutely no fat on this thing. It's lean and mean and gets right down to the point: ninjas! It's a scientific fact that ninjas are way cooler than pirates and robots combined. Even dead people know this to be true. That's why it's hard to even muster the energy to attempt to try to bag on a movie like Ninja. The script is flimsier than a leaf in a hurricane, the dialogue is spotty at best and trying to make sense of every plot detail just outs you as an unpatriotic ninja hater. What the movie does do well is show you ninjas killing the crap out of everyone on screen. Scott Adkins and Tsuyoshi Ihara have a hellacious final duel and everything leading up to it is paced faster than a one hundred yard dash. Let's be honest, you didn't have any interest in this movie for its stern position on global politics and the humane treatment of thoroughly owned ninja victims. You came here for ninja-on-ninja action. It's way better than Casper Van Dien's suckfest Mask of The Ninja and in my opinion slightly better than Ninja Assassin. It is not, however, better than Chris Lambert's The Hunted. That one is the high water mark for trashy non-Japanese ninja movies.

• Fun, albeit flawed

  RipTheJacker2010-02-15

  This movie has potential, but within that potential are several flaws. Though the flaws don't make this a terrible movie, they do deter from some of the film's positive aspects. The film tells the tale of American orphan Casey who is raised into a clan of ninjas and rivaled by an equally powerful warrior. Eventually the rival's anger gets the best of him and he is banished for breaking a ninja code of honor. He is then forced to pursue a new career in assassinations and theft for an evil organization. Casey must use what his master has taught him over the years to protect the sacred 'box' and stop his rival. Sounds promising, right? Well, it goes slightly downhill from here. Casey is accompanied by a female companion who is able to out-maneuver Casey several times, yet she manages to get herself caught and nearly killed several times. She bears a huge burden of Casey, and most of the film consists of Casey keeping her from getting hurt, saving her from getting killed, and finding her after she gets kidnapped. Unfortunately the negatives continue. The movie tries to hard to merge East with West, and often times I find myself cringing at the Japanese actors attempting to speak coherent English, although I do admit Casey does a splendid job. Throw in some incompetent cops who can't seem to do anything right but get in the way and die, and you have yourself a crumbling premise. Another problem is the character development. We don't really get a background check of most of the cast as to how they ended up where they did and why they are exactly there. Which brings me to my next problem, the so called evil organization. Without any intent, motive, or purpose we are introduced to this organization of wealthy leaders and street thugs. The thugs are persuaded to join this clan and they are represented with leather hoodies and a branding to the chest. How they got there, what are they doing, why are they doing it remains a mystery. It seems the film-makers just wanted to toss a group of enemies as sandbag punching fillers to get Casey's juices flowing. Well, it worked... which brings me to my positives. This movie has a lot of action, a lot of amazing choreography, and a lot of blood. Mix it together, and you have yourself a winning combination. While the blood CG seems to be a bit off, that can be forgiven due to it's minimal budget internet release (I). The action is kept as realistic as possible, while maintaining a lot of amazing ninja skills we've grown to love from Eastern cinemas. The slow-motion and camera work is top notch, and the cinematography deserves a praise. For a (I) this movie is built and presented really well. Another positive is the actor who plays Casey, Scott Adkins. Some viewers might recognize him as Uri Boyka from 'Undisputed II' (and soon to be III). This man is BEYOND fantastic at martial arts. He is right next to Michael Jai White as being one of the best American martial artists I've witnessed. He can very well be the Van Damme of the 21st century. He's built well, his acting is great, and his fight choreography is simply amazing. The stunts, added with the camera angles and the slow-mo make for a roller-coaster of a ride. This movie may not be the BEST martial arts movie out there, but it is simply enjoyable to watch for any fan of martial arts. If you enjoy the brutal street brawls of 'Undisputed' and the choreographed martial arts of 'Ong Bak' then you will DEFINITELY love this movie. Just don't expect anything from the story, the extras, and rest of the actors. Go into this film with an open mind, and a thirst for bloody good violence, and I'm sure you will leave satisfied. I gave this movie a 6/10 because even though the goods outweigh the bad, it's simply hard to ignore the fact that there still are flaws to the film. Regardless, it is a very enjoyable film, and to those who enjoy martial arts films and/or enjoy East meets West mash-ups, then you will definitely enjoy this film! Give it a try!